Bullying has been around since the beginning of time. Cavemen bullied other cavemen into feeling inferior because maybe their forehead was bigger then other cavemen kids' foreheads or because their club was smaller than other cavemen kids' clubs. Regardless, it has been around forever and is constantly taking new shapes and forms. As a teacher, and a human being in general I loathe bullying. Too many children are bullied until they can see no way out. Telling them that high school is such a short, insignificant time in their lives doesn't work as they cannot see past tomorrow let alone 4 years from now. Too often do we hear on the news that another CHILD committed suicide because they could not face their bullies anymore. They are lonely, sad, desperate and see no other way out. Here are some tips to help your child if they are being bullied.
1. Walk away, the bully won't get the satisfaction of your reaction. Often bullies are lazy and don't want to chase after their victims.
2. Tell your teacher. Or if your teacher is being lazy themselves, go to an administrator. If that doesn't work, go to the police or media. They will listen. Bullying is harassment and often assault and needs to be taken seriously.
3. Avoid violence. It won't help no matter how strong you are.
4. Finally, bullies pick their victims because they are not confident in themselves. Exude confidence while dealing with the situation.
All of these tips are useful but don't always help. Parents must make sure to monitor their children closely. Is your normally happy go lucky child quiet, sad, lonely, or sullen? Do they no longer want to get up and go to school and are the faking being sick? Talk to them about it. If that bully is so terrible that your child no longer wants to go to school think about changing schools. Although this may seem the cowards way out, it may also save your child's life. To often schools do not have good enough consequences for bullies and although they are reported, they don't face anything drastic or life changing.
In short, bullies suck and they themselves have low self esteem and confidence. If you suspect your child may be a bully themselves, talk to them immediately and try and come up with a way that will reach them and explain to them why bullying is so not okay.
On a side note, I recently read an article that I found interesting and a bit enlightening...think light bulb moment!
Remember when you were a child and a boy would pull your hair, punch you, shove you, pick on you, etc? And everyone just said it was because he liked you? Ya well I'm not okay with that. Teaching your child that verbal or physical abuse is an acceptable way to show you love someone is just not cool on any level. If I have a daughter and someone feeds them the line that it's "just because they like them" I'm going to ask them if them if they would like me to show them how much I like them in the same fashion. This article really hit the nail on the head and made me rethink why we are telling our daughters that its okay for boys to do that to them. In short, lets teach our daughters to demand respect and accept nothing less. And for those of you with sons, teach them an appropriate way to show their affection and to respect women.
And in gossip girl fashion...
XOXO
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